“One of my daughters, who is 16, wants to get Facebook. I took a look at the site, and it doesn’t seem safe to me at all. She says she will set the highest privacy settings to her account, but I don’t know about this.” is a thought from one of the worried parent Archana D’Souza about their child.
“All my friends have it and they think its crazy I don’!I never really wanted it before, but now that I think about it I do!My older sister has it, and I would add her and she could make sure I don’t add anyone I don’t know and stuff! Also I’m 16. I am responsible, and good in school and blah blah blah…But they seem to have something against it. So what should I do?” is what the 16-year-old Pia D’Souza feels.
So what is it all about?
In this twenty-first century, being in touch with our friends becomes real hard with our every day busy schedules. Social networks like Facebook, Twitter, and MySpace play a significant role in this aspect. The younger generation is no longer behind in getting access to these sites on par with adults. But many parents are suspicious of the time their children spend on such sites. It’s a legitimate concern about the children’s safety. But the children still try to find away to get one.
Here are few steps on convincing your parents on this issue:
1>> Sit with your parents to discuss the issue in a calm and relaxed way. Tell them that you would really appreciate the opportunity to explain why you think you should be allowed to have such an account. This may not work if your parents are very sheltering.
2>> Write everything that you will benefit from a Facebook account on a piece of paper. However, read off of the paper when you’re talking to your parents. It will look too planned. So instead, try to memorize your key points. It will look like you’re speaking from your mind than practicing for a public speaking event. Try to be mature and reasonable with your parents.
3>> Explain that you would like the account to keep in touch with friends and that you will not use the account to talk to people they do not know and do not approve of.
4>> Talk them through the safety features of the site – how you can restrict access to your page so that only your friends can see it.
5>> Let them know that you are aware of the dangers of giving your personal details out on the internet and reassure them that you will follow all sensible steps to stay safe.
6>> You will have to judge what your parents will find an acceptable amount of time spent on Facebook. – Assure them that all homework and chores will be done before you spend time on Facebook or the computer in general.
7>> If they don’t think you’re mature enough, prove it to them. It may take some time, but it’ll be worth it.
8>> If your parents stand firm and it doesn’t happen, wait a while. Let them forget about it, and then ask them again in a few weeks
Few more Tips that may help:
i>Tell your parents you feel out of the loop and that your friends are always talking about Facebook so you feel left out.
ii>A good idea is to wait to ask them after you’ve accomplished something, like after you’ve gotten a good grade or report card. You’re already leaned to their good side to start with and they might be more willing to negotiate while they’re happy with you. Plus, it’ll only be fair; it’ll be like a reward.
iii>If you have an older sibling who also does not have a Facebook account, talk to them too and get them involved. Two heads are better than one!
iv>Offer to let your parents have your password or be your friend on Facebook so they can check on your account.
v>Tell your parents that you will follow whatever guidelines that they set for your Facebook account.
vi>Ask for Facebook as a gift, such as part of a birthday present or Christmas present.
vii>Be patient about it. If they say they need to think about it, respect that. There are better chances of them allowing you to have a Facebook if you don’t keep bugging them about it. It takes time.
viii>Let them know how this will make you happy, and why it will benefit you, because truly, parents only want to make their children happy.
You should also know this:
(a) Depending upon your age, your parents may well believe that you are too young. Accept their decision – they are older and wiser than you and have your best interests at heart. You aren’t legally allowed to use Facebook until you’re 13 or older anyway. Facebook is generally targeted for teens that are starting high school and older.
(b) Don’t pester your parents and ask them every hour or every day for a Facebook account. You’ll just seem like a baby.
(c) Don’t beg. It will ruin your chances.
(d) If you get a Facebook account don’t add anyone you don’t know!
(e) If your parents say no, then deal with it. Ask them in some other time and be nice and sweet.